WAW on rebound, toxic inlaws, mental health issues

[trbuste]

If I could've substituted your sitch to my sitch, my W said EXACTLY the same things to me. Every single point. That's why we talk here about how the WW/WAS have a 'script'. Your W fits the bill precisely. Don't believe anything she says or take her words as something serious. If she was truly sorry and remorseful, this is not how she would communicate it.

Hi and thanks for your comment. It gives me comfort to know that somebody can relate to this exact situation. I feel most of what she is saying is unreasonable, and if she was truly sorry indeed she would meet up with me and explain her actions face to face. I find her way of sending a 10 line note rather immature. I think the main messages are still fuelled by anger.

I will comment on the following:

2. This was probably brewing for her for months if not years. The LBS sees this as an abrupt sudden thing, hence calling it the 'bomb drop' (BD), but it's been simmering for a long time for the WW/WAS.

3. Is her anger truly unjustified? Can you not think of your marriage with more objectivity and see where you fell short? Try and be more critical about yourself and see what part you played in its demise. She may not be justified for everything, but right now her anger is blaring at full cylinders and she will blame you for everything. So, some of it is justified, but some is not. Figure out what is justified and use that to make personal improvements and figure out areas of growth for you.

2. All I know is that she said to her friend that she was already happy in March. This was 2 months into the legal process. She kept on telling me to drop the legal case and get a job. I didn't respond to that nagging.

3. She can be angry about the fact that I read her messages and betrayed her privacy yes. Everything else I find unjustified. I stuck to my guns to proceed with the case, and I was proven right by the authorities. She didn't have the patience to see it through. As a matter a fact she abandoned her husband in a time he needed his wife most, when he was depressed and unemployed.

I have played back the scenario in my head dozens of times, and honestly the only thing I would have changed would be the way I argued with her about the case. Never in a million years would I have dropped it, as it was fully justified to proceed.

Thanks