I don't have much useful to add, just chiming to say a lot of us get it. My wife was/is my best friend of a decade, who I confided everything in.

It's touch going through something (Her) that I can't discuss with her.

Me, H-39, W-33
T11, M3
No children
Bomb 10/17 - "Not sure what she wants"
Bomb 2 12/17 - forced convo it did not go well.
W moved out 3/18
OM Confirmed 4/1
D Final 9/27/18