Very interesting how she is willing to throw OM right in the trash can. (Of course I don't believe it; sadly, I think she'll just go underground with it all.). But it shows how dispensable people are to her and of course if she can do it to one she easily can do it to another.
And yes, the truth is it really isn't at all simple anymore. Something is very wrong with her. And there's no way this can be like flicking a switch. There is zero remorse and worse, there is absolutely no comprehension that she went waaaay off the reservation. She has done zero processing. If you took her up on her offer she is still way, way behind you in maturity. You'll have nothing in common with her at this stage. I suspect she has a long way to go.
Seems to me she is just scared of the wheels she has put in motion and she should be.
Me 41, H 47, M 15 yrs, S11, S13 BD 1: 11/4/14 we work on it; really I pretzel myself BD 2: 3/31/15 H goes down to "dorm room" 8/15: H back to MBR 10/15: H back in dorm room 1/18: H files, now divorced
