OMG, the rage I felt reading the parting words your husband said to you. I wish I had been there because I would likely kick him in the nards. You are an AMAZING woman and he is a stupid, stupid, stupid idiot. You cannot reconcile with this man. If you divorce him and and he gets a clue and then does the work to woo you back (and work on his awfulness) then you can reconcile. If my husband said I should have aborted my kids I would be blinded with rage.

This is the bottom line, do whatever you have to for protecting yourself and child financially, emotionally and physically. You MUST go NC as much as possible. I know in my state I can have WH pay back legal fees of the divorce. Set a list with concrete goals, rule in or out surgery and plan from there. Where is your family? Is there anyone you can reach out to?

M 10yrs T 13yrs
BD #1Oct 2015-PA between WAH and COW
BD #2 April 2016-WH resumed PA, she broke it off
Jan 2 2017 WH says he wants divorce
April '17-Letting go
2018 D busted
DD8, DS6, DS3