Your pity party, and thinking it's your fault are totally normal, and something we've all gone through. So are your feelings of aloneness. I don't know if it helps you to know this. I'm not trying to minimize you pain by saying we've all been thru it, but to show you you're not alone.
M:23 T:26 Me:53, Wife: 60 S:18 D:16 filed 7/16 W moved out 4/28/17