New LBS dealing with WW Part 3

[Vanilla]

An OOP isn't burning a bridge it is a boundary enforcement. It is saying this behaviour has gone too far, next time more consequences.

The OOP itself isn't enforceable until you file it with the police. So you have an OOP then you can file it if you need to.

Let me just discuss PTSD. I have this big time, BIG TIME. I have had to learn to handle it.

Firstly it's complex PTSD, it derives from being in a war zone and over time. It doesn't arise from a single incident, car accident, attack etc. It is slow and steady trauma.

It becomes part of your physiology. Let me reassure you this is absolutely normal and natural. If this weren't so then you would be repressing and this is much much worse.....

Relax it's uncomfortable but won't kill you.

Firstly there is accepting this is what you have. Important as I said for even dealing with it.
Secondly know it can reduce, you can live with it and eventually change the pattern in it
Thirdly education finding out about it
Fourthly monitoring, know your triggers and identify times places and feelings that cause this
Finally treatment, and there will be treatment for it, some of it may arise from earlier in your life from FOO (family of origin issues). Different treatmentS work for different peeps at different times on different issues. No one size fits all, and just because one therapy works on one issue doesn't mean it works on all.

Be with it, walk into it, experience it, face it. There is an aspect to complex PTSD which is very hard to understand. It's called post traumatic growth, this experience has grown me as a person more than anything ever has. Much much more. I would rather not have had it but it has grown me and developed me into a better and more rounded person. It has educated me. I can already tell that you are on that road yourself, as a father you will excel, as a potential partner you will be amazing. Becoming the man only a fool will leave. I already see this in your future. It is not so far away you may not be aware, but it's not.

Let me also explain shift to you, shift happens in an instant, it's permanent. It is when you know and can never unknow. It converts to wisdom as this permanently changes your brain chemistry and structure. Change can be undone, change doesn't always last. Change requires external validation, this shift is internal and it's permanent.

I love seeing shift on the board, it is wonderful when true growth realisation and development occurs, such as with you.

You will be both excited energised and tired. You will need sleep and extra nutritious food. Perhaps a weekend away with your children walking in nature. Time alone is valuable too. Work is torture sometimes at others you breeze through.

Be kind to your body as it heals. It has served you well.

Breathe.

Recovery has begun.

V