I know for me my W was not happy with me becoming a slob, not taking care of the outside of the house, etc. Also sitting around the house watching TV. Those 2 components of loosing respect played a role in my sitch. My W did nag on me to change this but at the time I did not take her naggin seriously and it wasn't until a week before BD, were she really went off on me that I understood how serious she was. I remember making the statement to her that I didn't know how important this was to you and I am sorry.......her response was I guess it is.
So for me and my W, IMO, it comes down to bad communication. This is also stuff that I can easily fix now knowing how important it is to her. Maybe I will get the chance
