What should I be doing now? (It's done)

[Sotto]

Hi Coconut, I agree with AS above. I wouldn't assume that what you might get from the WAS would bring closure. My XH said a few things to be that didn't help me at all:

When he D'd me he said that I was beautiful, he loved me and I had been the best wife, but he knew that he really needed a new family now...

That was what he offered me and in truth it didn't really help me at all. Closure I think comes from your own processing of what has happened and accepting the end of your marriage. It has helped me to think of XH and me as separate and no longer living co-joined lives in any way. He decides what he wants to do, so do I. Some of his decisions may not be great, some of his behaviour may not be great, but that's all up to him..

I also don't think I was the kind of wife that deserved my XH to run off with a much younger woman and lie about it for months, but it happened and that way of exiting the marriage is all on him. I'm glad I don't have to live with that. I was an imperfect spouse as we all are, but whilst there are things to learn, I'm generally at peace with my part in the marriage.

So, rather than looking to her for something, take some time to gently and kindly look within.