As far as "not having one R conversation" look on the bright side: no R conversation is a whole heck of a lot better than the false R. I know that's not much comfort, but being dismissed sure beats being kept on the hook.
I'll also throw this out there: you're only 43. Another child in your future is NOT outside the realm of possibility. I'm 43, too, and also like you, I'm an adoptive father with no biological children (though to be honest, that doesn't matter to me. My daughter is the best thing that's ever happened to me, and the circumstances of her birth don't matter to me at all) and I still hold out hope that I'll be a dad again. Don't close the door so hastily.
