Cherry. Getting on with a few bumps

[Cherry]

So you’re not feeling overly detached?

Not much is new R wise in my land. Though I’m not overly sure what i want. I don’t want to speak too soon, but I’m feeling very detached right now. I saw him briefly as i walked out last week. I had some things to do. He looked miserable as ever, i gave a hello and that was that. For the first time, he seemed ugly to me, I’m not meaning that in the fact physically (he is a good looking guy, though he knows that)- but his actions and the person he has become. And for the first time when i saw him, i just thought “nah”. Maybe I’m on my way to not caring. It’s just his continuous actions and his lack of support both financially and physically towards the children just anger me. He should be thanking his lucky stars to have these beautiful babies.

My life on the other hand, busy as usual. Juggling motherhood, life, a career and a business I’ve set up as a side line is tiring. But I’m determined to do what is best for my family. The Christmas break has meant I’ve had time to spend with my children, lovely days out. An awakening moment came to me that these years are flying past, and before i knowvit, they’ll want to hang with their friends and won’t want to have days out with their mom, or hold my hand with their teeny hands. I realised i should cherish this time and not waste energy on someone who does not deserve it