Subitai, I'm so sorry to hear that this move is happening soon. It's so sad for the kids. I wish there'd be some way for you and your wife to fix things. I'm so sad for my daughter in my situation and wish so badly that kids didn't have to suffer through these things. It sounds like you're dealing with everything well. I hope there's still a chance your wife will change her mind. You two are still talking and that's a positive sign.
Yah, we're actually talking more, and more productively, than we have in the last year, I think. But not every day. We go days between substantive discussions. And we're still moving towards Separation. She hasn't asked to recon.
Originally Posted By: AnotherStander
Subitai, I'm mainly asking out of curiosity as I've never heard of a setup quite like this before, are you saying that you and your W are going to be switching back and forth between the house and apt.? IE, you're both sharing the same house and apt., but switch back and forth week-to-week while the kids stay in the house full time?
Yes, it's called Bird Nesting. It doesn't seem to be a long-term stable situation from what I've gleaned online, but it's way less disruptive to the kids, especially if you can't afford two separate residences. It requires a lot more civility, though, because you're sharing space, sharing expenses, etc. Basically you have a business partnership with regards to the living spaces. This way the kids don't have to bounce back and forth, forget their school stuff, etc. The parents put up with the dislocation and juggling.
Most of what I've seen is that it lasts anywhere from a few months to a year or two, and falls apart when somebody gets into a serious relationship and their new partner is not thrilled with sharing space with the ex. Then a new normal needs to be adopted.
It's apparently gaining popularity, but is definitely a 'transitional' phase.
Me: Mid 40s W : Early 40s M:11 T:13 S, D, both 7-10 BD : 11/2017 Separation : 1/18
