The book helps you set your own boundaries so when your W asks you to do something you are more willing to do it becuase you have not sacrificed our own boundaries assuming she hasn't asked you to do something that compromises 1 of your NUTS. Truthfuly everyone has them is just never looked at them like this before.
I would be really shocked if she made a move. The funny thing is that over the past couple of weeks I have really started to see her for who is at this moment in her life. Everything is superficial, no substance, all about her and I do get the sense she is scared.
We approaching 7 months of separation so the newness and the honeymoon phase should be wearing off. The things I have done to improve my life have really helped with my self-confidence and I feel much better about myself. I do feel the respect is coming back, I don't put much into her words but I don't see the same resentment in her eyes, she is not constantly trying to get me to watch the children and really, in a nut-shell she is not fuching with me like other sitchs on this board. So the only thing I know to do is to keep doing what I am doing and see if she starts to come around. I don't think there is much more that I can do so the rest is up to her. I think knowing that also helps me let go.
The longer this goes on as well the more I can see the laws of attraction starting to kick in. I don't think I saw this early on as she was wound up like a Cat 5 Hurricane but now that she is not wound so tight I can see where being distant, not pursuing, etc. would start to benefit the R.
I am not saying she wants to recon but now I can see where you can't help your R in the first few months, only hurt it, I can I am also starting to see where if you can make it through the initial rush of emotions you got a chance and that is where the pursuit/distance factors and everything else that we discuss around her comes into play.
