I am sure there are still those on this board who would agree with you... I would have advised against your sending a birthday wish to your WW... She doesn't want you... She doesn't care to have a marriage with you... She rejects you again and again... That is your reality...
Really look at yourself: You want a woman you are afraid of, who exhibits wrath when you don't comply, who chose to be with OM, and who continues contact with him, to CHOOSE YOU! WHY???
You need to let her go... Really give her the opportunity to get herself right... That will not happen while she still has a hold on you... And you need to take this time to get yourself right... to overcome your tendency to wilt at conflict... You both have a lot of growing to do... You are fortunate to be in this situation at such a young age... Run with that!
