Limerence and My Situation 6

[Parkema]

Vanilla,

Initially in the early stages of my situation everyone could see I was TOTALLY obsessed in winning my WW back and did everything wrong.

I feel the hardest aspect to all this is the insecurity or the realisation that there is a better than good chance she is gone and gone for good! How do we react to such realisations? What is seen so often is give up and pursue D too soon, this is NOT DR'ing.

With the time I have had I see slowing down any emotional choices the best option, I have told myself I will not end my family that's for her to do and her alone.
Normally the wayward will want to have both their AP/LO and their S so that all their EN's can be met, this gives me the time to work on my future and that of my boys knowing eventually deterioration of their R HAS TO HAPPEN.

If I could say one thing to all BS on here is this - you are the number one challenge to the AP/LO and their R with your S. The longer you remain in the picture the more threatened AP/LO becomes, now with you making yourself so much more a better prospect due to DR'ing and remaining civil without pursuing and believing in time to erode their R your odds of RC'ing the MR goes in your favour.

Forget about your WS and their life you have no control over it just concentrate on you and plan your GAL activities as a goal for 2018.
Exercise - mon to fri.
Movie night once a week.
Out with the boys/girls once a week.

And so on. Make an excel sheet throughout the year, literally put it down on paper this will encourage you carry it out. Eventually it will become second nature and whilst your doing it makes you more attractive to your WS whilst threatening the AP, win-win...

Come on all lets do this and make 2018 the year of the betrayed spouse.

Happy new year.

Mark.