I'm not able to write much tonight but saw your update. It's good you were able to spend Christmas with other family members and stay busy. I'm sure it would have been better with your kids but it's good you survived and hopefully next week there will be comfort in returning to the regular routine.
What is it about church? It's supposed to be a place of support and hope but I also had tears in my eyes at church on Christmas Eve. I wish God could take away our pain but sadly it doesn't work like that. I'm sure everyone here who goes to church struggles with their faith to some degree when going through a divorce.
I feel sure your wife missed you on Christmas day. If you two were married for 23 years this is a major reality check to spend Christmas alone. If you apologized sincerely to your wife I think it's crazy if she doesn't want to give the marriage another shot but it's at least good the two of you are working through everything without major fights or drama.
