Christmas wasn't as bad as I feared it would be. I had some rough moments and a few awkward ones when people who didn't know yet asked where H was.
I think I handled it very well except I did say he is choosing to spend Christmas with his girlfriend and her family.
Journaling
I talked with a friend of a family member who has a close friend dealing with her H's MLC. She asked if my H was MLC and I said I believed so.
She was shocked by my H's actions or rather lack thereof. She can't believe there is no consistent spewing or threats or just plain meanness.
Her friend's H apparently is very nasty and has done just about everything that can be imagined. I am grateful I don't have to deal with too much of the monster but on the other hand I just don't hear from my H at all.
So that got me thinking....again. My H hasn't acted that bad as far as monster. Yes, there have been some angry outbursts and acting out (OW, drinking, running away) but he hasn't gone out of his way to be outright mean.
He hasnt said anything other than the standard ILYB and she gets me nonsense. No rude comments about me just the comments about himself, not being happy, he's lost something, he's a failure etc.
This woman said her friend believes she has a good chance of reconciling because the better the marriage was the harder the MLC is. The harder the MLC is the better the chances of restoring the relationship.
She asked what my thoughts were on that and I said I honestly don't know. I did not think H and I had a bad marriage but he truly isn't being near as horrible as some other MLC spouses.
Honestly, my H is just a very kind guy and the things he has done are bad for him. Maybe not bad as far as MLC standards go but definitely not his usual actions.
This is definitely a roller coaster. At barely 6 months in I am so ready to get off. My heart goes out to each one of you who has been in this so much longer. You all are truly some of the strongest men and women there are.
