Gordie #15: closing the cake shop

[Sotto]

Good job with the screaming Gordie - it does release something and watch for the calm(er) feelings that follow.

I find the whole 'open marriage' conversation incredible - though I'm quite sure XH would have wanted the same. He and I had that convo in a much more roundabout way.

You really see the mindset of me, me, me in what she said. And she really wants you to fall in with those plans. The important thing is to be your own truth and let her clearly know. You may feel that would work for you - it certainly wouldn't work for me. Normally the clear, single sentence, no nonsense response is best.

I wouldn't agree that the 'tough' response necessarily brings them back. I think there is a better shot with that than rolling over for a tummy tickle. But of course there are no guarantees and always best to do what works purely for you and not as a strategy to try and 'make her' do something.

Any ways, all things considered - and yours is a challenging situation - I think you are doing well my friend.

X