Hi Gordie, yes Bttrfly said the victim stuff so much better than me - thanks B!

You are a victim of her current choices - and this is about recognising that and choosing not to dwell there IMHO. Thinking of forward momentum for myself in my situation and what could I do to achieve that forward movement helped me. But then I had an absent rather than 'in your face' MLCer...

I found the drama triangle quite helpful in moving forward if you want to google that at some point.

Glad you are getting some good advice from others too. We all have things that helped us and opinions about your situation. Hopefully in all of that you can pick out what will help you and move you further forward towards a more settled and peaceful place.

Best wishes to you :)x

T 13 M 7
Me 48 H 46
SS 15
BD 7.14 PA
D final 5.16 (H filed)

We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus