I cannot help but feeling like the path to R maybe be eroding as the days go on.
I think that is common but only you know when it is time to give up and throw in the towel. You can hold on to hope as long as you wish.
Just keeping working on yourself your W will never want to come back to a R with you if you have not gone through some personal growth. Hopefully over time she will notice the changes, those changes will cause her to start respecting you again, then her walls start to drop and then you can potentially move forward in a new relationship.
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The feeling of being with someone for 26 years and not being able to have physical touch is perhaps the most difficult thing to deal with, early on I was questioning myself as to was I good enough.
Just keep working on your confidence. IMO taking pride in your personal appearance is huge step in the right direction. Lose weight, get jacked, new clothes, new hair style, body lotion, cologne, etc.
Once you start feeling confident your need for personal touch should decrease because you won't need it to feel good about yourself. I got a small hug from W yesterday, the first time in months, and I really felt nothing.
You are good enough, don't ever doubt yourself. The problem with most men is that we put our W's in a position of being our sole source of validation and her opinion was the only one that mattered. If she didn't give us a gold star for the day we felt bad. You are good enough and you don't need your W's validation to make you feel that way. Man in the mirror......do you like what you see?
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I am getting ready to go to the gym and tonight going out to dinner with S21 and D18 with my parents.
