She is going to continue to play, "He's just a friend", until you finally get enough. When you get fed up, you'll see how simple it is to tell her that you have decided you don't want to be with a woman who thinks it's appropriate in a MR to have private friendships with members of the opposite sex. It does not matter what she calls the relationship, if her H doesn't like it.....that should settle it. There should be no argument or pleas. The spouse takes priority over all other relationships.
Look, you know good & well she would not stand for you having a chummy friendship with some woman. You would not get away with telling her the OW was just a friend. So, why put up with her playing you for a fool? That's what she does every time she plays oh so innocent and asks, "What's wrong", and turns around and offers to cuddle with you. You would be the biggest chump ever.....to let her think you are putty in her hand. The man that attracts a woman is the man who she can't work like putty.
Pew, I played my H for a fool. Every WW does it. But I was the fool....and so is your WW. She just won't see it until you stop letting her have the best of both worlds.
You have a good support team here on the board. Sometimes we hit hard, but it's b/c we know you have a shot at turning things around for the better, if you'll stop playing her games and waiting to see if she'll change. You just haven't been able to fully trust in yourself, yet. I hope one of your goals is to build up your self esteem, and know that you can learn skills that will attract your W back into the M.
Please stick with us, Pew. ((hugs))
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
