still struggling

[Jim1234]

Nicole, the divorce has been a catalyst for introspection. I've realized that I contributed more to the demise of my marriage than I thought, and I'm making some changes, rekindling friendships, etc. So that's all good.

I don't think she is going through that process, or cares to. I can safely say she harbors a lot of resentment, years' worth. If she ever reconsiders, it will take a looooong time.

We get along very well. It's a very amicable divorce, so far. We still run in the same social circle, mostly (she's become closer to people I don't care for), and are polite, if not warm, when we see each other.

I'll try things along the lines you suggested, but the resentment runs so deep, I don't see it having much effect.