XW is taking D to visit OMs family for the holidays. Actually told me about it in advance, which was a nice surprise.

XW also wanted to change the schedule to have D wake up at her house on either Christmas Eve of Christmas Day. This was after I offered her an afternoon this week so she and D could have some time together in the middle of not seeing her for over two weeks. On that afternoon, they took D to Toys R Us and let her pick out all of her Christmas and Birthday presents (wtf?) then took her to see her uncle in jail.

XW (and now OM) count down the days while they're on the phone with D. Not "until Christmas" but "Until we get to see you." It's maddening. D came into my room the other night while on the phone with her mother, her mom said, "Go somewhere else, you know daddy doesn't like you with him." I'm sure she MEANT "while you're on the phone with me" but jesus how does that sound to a six year old? "Of course you can stay in here, sweetie."

D is being coached. She told me that she's going to live with mommy this summer, and that she's changing schools next year. That her current school is "old" and the other schools she might go to are "so much better." "But it's ok, daddy, I'll see you on the weekend." During mediation, XW wanted to know when D would be allowed to choose where she lives.

When I didn't relent on Christmas, XW threw some spew at me saying I treated her like a worthless nobody even now, and she should have known I wouldn't change that toward her. I don't even understand where this stuff comes from.

Just venting and journaling, though if anyone has any advice about what to do about the coaching, I'm all ears. I'm not going to stoop to the same, I refuse to be someone who puts their kids in the middle, but I'd love some advice here.


Just keep swimming