Hi Maika, glad you are doing ok. I think something to remember is that just because the end result might not be as you want it to be at the moment, it doesnt mean that your effort or your growth isnt good enough or correct.
Just so you are aware, I still get wound up inside sometimes and I feel the same as i used to... I just give myself a second to think nowadays which goes along the lines of.."would me going nuts right now, make this situation any better?" 9/10 its a "No it wont", so I keep my trap shut.
I do think a big key to a good relationship is communication. I still express my thoughts and concerns, but do it through a filter of compassion. If I didnt say it, I wouldnt be true to myself and I couldnt live with that. But THE WAY its said is the big change for me.
I think learning to be alone, and to be comfortable in your own skin is a such a long and hard journey and most people in long term relationships dont have to address it, as they constantly have the other partner validating them throughout.
Stay focused on yourself and what will be will be. We sometimes forget the fragility of life worrying about little things and we lose time (where we should be enjoying oursleves) as we try and fit into someone else's ideal.
