Hi Caz, I'm so sorry to hear your latest news. So basically your husband sends you emotionless robotic texts but has no problem carrying on a relationship with someone else that sends him emoji and heart texts? That's just so awful. It sounds like he's back in England but if not, if I were you, I'd probably do something crazy like show up on his doorstep in the country where he works with divorce papers ready for him to sign.
It seems better you found out this information so you have what you need to grieve and move on. Not that you can just move on. That could take months or years, but it brings some kind of closure to a situation where you've already tried everything.
Maybe this is totally the wrong advice, but I feel like you could benefit from having a male friend with whom to go to dinner or a movie sometimes. You don't need to be dating, but there must be a man in your same situation in your area who would appreciate some company. Maybe you don't want to date or get re-married any time soon, but your closest female friends sound busy and they're probably in stable marriages so it's hard for them to relate.
I don't know. All of this is so unfair. I'm so disappointed in humans' capacity to do these things without any regard for anyone else. And who are these women and men having affairs with our spouses without any morals or caring that their affair partner is married? How can so this be so common? I just feel so sad that we live in a world where the people we should love and trust the most abandon us and don't even care.
My situation is no better than yours. I can only say that I know the feelings of being so alone, not knowing what the future holds, not knowing how to replace the void. It doesn't seem like going out dancing and going to the gym alone can fix the breakup of a family or the end of a long marriage. There has to be a deeper change, a deeper acceptance of this whole affair phenomenon and of the fact that we have so little control over the actions of the person who promised to love us forever. I hope you can find a way to divorce your husband and start over. It can't get much worse than it is now!
