I want to Stand, but think it's hopeless.

[Gordie]

Galpal,

I second own it. It’s not either or.

I am a fellow journeyman in this land of indecision. I too don’t know what to do from here. I’m trying to be okay with that. I figure that I am under no external pressure to decide. I can make up my mind when I want.

No, it’s not a comfortable place to be, but I’ve been through worse—we both have. Take it easy on yourself. Seek out some wise counsel. Ask for help from your higher power. Take your time until you are consistently confident in a certain direction.