Wife wont admit to affair and its driving me nuts!

[Morbo]

So, wife came over this morning.
She had the kids, and I'm taking them for the next 3 days.

After yesterday being really sad on the phone she was pretty happy today. I'm trying to keep detached but its hard and I dont really want her around. I'm barely containing my anger at her affair but then I'm also confused as I keep thinking maybe she's not and its just a plain loss of love situation as she maintains(partly true). I still dont have that proof except for all that I submitted on my first post. Maybe she's not? Aaaargh!
Its really hard to keep this whole detached attitude. Its always been a pattern that she makes me feel like an idiot and I end up apologizing.

I made a mistake then by mentioning that she should go up to OM with the baking pans she apparently "borrowed" last week. I was pretty sharp/cutting and she was really cranky at me and made me feel like crap, as usual.

I didnt apologize and I kept up the detaching and she left. Its hard though, especially when I'm still not sure.
I would hate to be going through all this if she is not having an affair. Maybe I'm being an [censored] for nothing. I just wish she'd tell me one way or the other..

Sorry for the rambling post