Hunny, we have all been where you are. We have all done the things you are doing, and worrying about him and the OW and the happiness they are having.
You are being told to do things now that you don't believe you can and you question how they will help you (GAL, focus on you, let him go, don't give the OW headspace, etc.).
In time these things will make sense. You will breathe them in and be able to let go and the sun will shine and the birds will sing and you will see life on the other side.
Until then, just cry, get it out, spend time doing things that make you happy. Come here to vent and to let people stop you from making those contacts because they will set YOU back (who cares what they do to him).
Holidays are hard, but here you have a family that knows that and supports you. We can hold your hand and tell you it will be ok.
