Gordie #14: the end of my M to MLC W, I think

[Gordie]

Own it,

You are right. I asked L about moving out again. He had previously advised against it. This time because it’s been 9 months since filing and we are still negotiating, he said I am free to leave.

Okay, ball back in my court. Do I leave ASAP before Christmas, sign something for January, or wait longer until the D is finalized (thought that would have been done by now, but she is dragging it out).

Do I tell her that I am moving out or do I just do it?

Am I making an emotional decision based upon recent events?

Reasons to move ASAP:

Immediate emotional relief
Less stressful Christmas break (can’t wait to have my own space)
Let her go/drop the rope
In house separation rarely leads to R

Reasons to wait:

Avoid bad Christmas memories of dad moving out for the kids
Wait for my emotions to calm down
Give her more time and space (in house)
Cake feeding to an extent has been good for my D negotiation

***

On another note, stbx asked me to feed her a huge slice of cake and I declined. She asked me why and I said because you fired me as your H! This got a really awkward look.

And Cali is right, the words need to match the actions. All the ILY and I miss you and maybe we can work this out mean nothing while she is with OM2. I have to stop letting her manipulate me.