I do think you did really well. You are in a really tough place, but you are valuing yourself which is soooo important.
I agree with Irish and Job. You don't want her to come back because she had to choose between the two of you. She needs to choose to drop everything because its the right thing to do, not just out of fear. I am afraid that if she doesn't get "well", she will pull the same stuff once she finds a new OM. She needs to come back down to earth before you can rebuild your M to a healthy place.
And yes, there is something about the holidays. Someone very close to me began rethinking the H she left, admittedly because the holidays does that to her. I told her unless she is serious and this will extend past the holidays not to comfort yourself with him, because it is truly not fair to him.
You are worth more than holiday lonliness. You deserve to have someone who wants ALL of you, not bits and pieces.
