Separation imminent....

[Hermes]

Another wrinkle:

This PM went out to run errands... came home, WW asked if we could talk... Spoke about logistical things... I was polite but reserved.

Then she asked about plans for x-mas (also logistical) but tied into BD on Family and kids re: D.
Made a snide comment @ how we won't speak again until tomorrow... I let it go didn't respond.

She also, made comment about how we could wait until tomorrow to do this... if I didn't want to talk now.

I gave my opinion (I think if we tell her P just after X-mas we should stay there that night and maybe just call my P vs visit... they are very old and get easily upset... worried that us showing up (which they would love and look forward to if I said we were coming) only to tell them several hours after arriving the D is imminent; or worse, having a nice time with them on arrival then waiting until next morning just before leaving to tell them, might not be good for them... but suppose there isn't a good way to do this.

She also said she's trying to work with me and do this the right way...

I said I am as well...

She said, It doesn't feel like it.

I didn't say anything.

Dreading conversation tomorrow...

Know this again won't change anything... and know that reaction from LRT can be negative... and I'm committed this time to keeping this going... but have to make sure I'm at least giving it my best effort in not being cold but reserved...

worried my responses to her (In retrospect I Haven't been smiling and happy with her when we communicate... but these conversations (I would just say I've been normal or a bit 'meh as in indifferent))

Thoughts on these interactions... or on messaging. (know some say I should say whatever I want, or tell her P and mine w/o details... but also balancing this with being kind and factoring in D process and how pissing her off now might impact that process given that we're headed full steam there).