Separation imminent....

[Hermes]

Working on these:
My goals used to be:
1. have a week without R/M/A talk..
2. Always be polite to her
3. Always speak softly to her (no raised voice)
4. Never us harsh words with her (to herself or others about her)
5. Join Church, attend regularly
6. GAL (at least 2x/week if not more)
7. Focus more on kids (this still needs ALOT of work)
8. Secure a Job
9. be reserved in my conversations w her (don't start, but if she does respond kindly and warmly).
10. Balance (If I am feeling out of whack or starting to... take a time out go for a walk, but do this kindly if in middle of discussion).
11. Keep working on how to communicate more effectively and better (as this was the biggest breakdown we had and still do have to a lesser extent)
12. Keep reading self-help books to improve self... take notes.
13. Go back over notes from past on DB forum and notes from Self help...
14. Re-read DB/DR as needed to remind me of goals.


and signs of improvement
1. She will start a conversation with me. (She does but only logistical typically)
2. She will smile at me from time to time (She has really occasionally)
3. She will be polite and kind to me (She has become more polite thanking me in return.)
4. She will let me know she's sorry for A (She's sorry it hurts me...)
5. She will watch a TV show with me (She did for a short while, now it's only if S15 wants to watch and I watch as a group).
6. ? still working on these...?
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