Newbie trying to gain control

[peacetoday]

alanon is a great program
main teaching is to detach from the alcoholic
very similar to DB and its free
in person meetings are everywhere..I find it super helpful in all my relationships

I don't live with a MLCER but some things I do to detach

focus on self
create gratitude list of my life
allow others to make their choices and mistakes
don't give advice unless asked
let go let go listen to tapes on letting go
find activities just for you or with kids
keep neutral if she is unavailable and make plans without her
practice in your mind letting go of her, when you think of her project good like she will work through it eventually
either the r will work or not but for now create peace for sake of kids

read
Ha who thread as she lives with MLCer

good luck