WW ended EA 4 mos ago; trying to restore intimacy

[hoosjim]

More smoke?

So, today is her early day from work, meeting she usually gets off early if things aren't too crazy. So, she calls me up to tell me she is going to the mall to do some shopping, to hopefully find an outfit she can wear to her office Christmas party this weekend, and to maybe buy something for my stepmother for Christmas. She says, oh, I think I'll stop by store X, because you were pretty lucky finding something for yourself to wear there. Now, there are three or four store exes around our town, and the one I went to is near my work. But she says to me, oh well I can go out to the mall, and then since it's on the way, I can stop at the store X Out near there. Thing is, the store X out there is in the exact same strip mall as the pub where om hangs out. not in the mood to play any games, I say are you sure you want to stop out there? That's right next to the pub, and you know he hangs out there a lot particularly on Fridays. Is that the position you want to put yourself in? So she says, hang out where, it's tore ex? And she kind of laughs like a joke. So I say kind of joking it myself that store X if you added booze might actually be a pretty good place to hang out at, but that I actually met the pub, and she says oh.


So, I track her phone, and she doesn't go there. But wondering if this is yet another smoke signal that I should be heeding.

An update: check the whereabouts a couple of more times, and she actually did go to store X. To all appearances she went in the store X and came out store X. And then drove right by the front of the pub where om hangs out. She couldn't have gone in giving the time frames involved. Still. Damn it. Be a lot easier if you were just seeing him. But this could be just typical Affair recovery. plus, don't know that I can tell her I'm tracking her today even though she knows I have that capability on her phone. Damn damn damn.




I mean, it's almost like she's daring me to say, I tracked you and know that you went and drove by the OM hang out. I mean, she knows that I can track her phone, and she has to know from our conversation that I pretty much didn't want her going out there, and of course i reinforced that I'm well aware that that's where the OM hangout is. I mean, the last thing she said to me was "oh I'm not going in there" (meaning OM'S hangout), but, cmon. And she had already been to mall and bought something (she just called but said nothing about store x).

I think she and I just need to have a talk tonight. Not confronting her about all of this specifically, but talking about where we are. We haven't really had a relationship talk in a few weeks now. Since just after our last counseling session. So it's probably been 3 weeks. Way overdue, and obviously I do have some concerns.