Don't be afraid of her choice words. Every time you feel she might suck you in or bait you, just think she's probably going out with OM to celebrate her bday. That should clear any NGS right up. Not saying start making more mental movies, but with OM in the picture, she's lucky if you even look her way by chance.
My W had her bday recently and I sent her a very short text about it. But, in my case I have no proof of OM and I didn't want her to think that I didn't wish her out of anger or spite. Trust me, if there was OM, I would've done absolutely nothing.
NGS is difficult stuff. I empathize with you as I saw myself in that book as well. Just work to change it up for yourself and don't take any $hit from her. If you think that her texts might just be too upsetting to deal with, turn off your phone for a few hours or the whole day if you can and do something for yourself.
Just remember - she's blatantly lied to you about cutting OM off. I made a new rule in my house - I don't suffer liars and cheaters. You know you're worth more than whatever she's slinging at you.
