I wouldn't worry too much about befriending the x. I'm feel the same as you, but I'm lucky no actual kids to tie me to my x.
He was quite violent towards my son, and so given his extreme measure of the violent events that lead to break down why would I want to see him? He's not someone I can trust nor. Is he someone I would want as a friend.
So I stay super dark, once I almost bumped into him at an event but I slipped away, because there is nothing to say. I would be able to keep the truth quiet in my head, so I think dark is the best and most respectful way to deal with it.
For me it actually works, and I didn't feel anything when I saw him bar pitty for how mentally ill the man is.
M 46 h54 Both married before T 11y Bd 2/14 I must see where ow leads! Ms 18 hs 26
