It has been a couple days; staying NC from WW...she is still calling/texting OM constantly. Her BDay is coming up in a couple of days, and I am not going to be speaking to her. I expect a few choice words from her b/c of me not wishing her a happy bday, but unfortunately for her, it is not my responsibility for her happiness at this point in time.
Until I rec'v a fully apology and an commitment to work on recon (a new MR); only then will I determine my reconciliation process and determine if I still want this person who has hurt me so much.
I have become sad over the past couple of days b/c hope is fading quickly. I am coming to the realization she is not going to stop EA/PA; and the reality of moving on and starting a new life is front and center. Although I am working with my IC on overcoming NGS, gaining confidence, and getting through my pain/resentment/anger; I am still losing a life long person in my life.
My pain and hurt is shifting from her not wanting me and being involved in a EA/PA --> to --> me being so foolish (passive/co-dependent) and letting someone treat me poorly for so long. This is what I am working on to become a better Chris right now.
Her sister and BIL reached out to me b/c they want me to meet their newborn, and I expressed I was not quite ready b/c I need my head and heart right before I make that commitment (which they responded in total understanding and let me know they are here for me whenever I am ready). I plan on going to meet up with them sometime in the next week or two. This is something I want to do; they are special to me; and I will make sure WW will not be around when I am there. Thoughts on this activity??
M:30 W:28 T:9 MR:2.5 NoKids Seperation 1: 9/16-12/16 Move back in: 1/17 BD: 8/15 She moved out: 9/1
