Yes, the texts may reflect a momentary feeling that passes (like "I really am a bad father") and then the next day it's back to the same behavior and thought pattern.
I did actually have my husband stay here at our apartment with our daughter last night and I left to go out. It was much better. She didn't have that fear of wondering where she was going to go and my husband didn't have to 'waste' his time driving around. She could play with her toys and eat the food that I prepared for her. When I returned my husband said it was much better, so at least for now I guess we'll continue with him coming and me leaving.
As my husband left he looked at me, which he doesn't normally do, and had a very guilty look on his face. It's hard to describe. I feel he had some kind of revelation recently. That doesn't necessarily mean he wants to fix the marriage but maybe he at least has some regret.
I didn't mention counseling to my husband last night but I still plan to do so. He called late last night again. I was semi-awake and I saw that he called, but I decided not to call him back. I figured it's best to not be too available and to give him more of a chance to think.
I don't know about other people's spouses here but mine gets very stressed by his job and everyday things like traffic and waiting in lines at the store. He spends most of his days stressed, semi-angry, and in a rush but after about 10:00 PM he seems to relax but then can't sleep. The psychologist said he doesn't think my husband is depressed but I do think there's something wrong.
I see both an IC and a psychologist although I haven't been to the psychologist for a few weeks now. The psychologist has tried reaching out to my husband to get him to come back to discuss his role as a father but my husband hasn't responded. I'll try to find a way to suggest it again this week.
