H....she hurt your ego I get it. Your angry and pissed. I would only suggest that displaying this towards your W is not going to help you reconcile. IMO it will only push her farther away. I deal with my anger by lifting a ton of weights. What do you do to help address yours? Everyone is different but everyone also needs an outlet or multiple!
I know its tough but try to stay focused on your goal and if what you are doing will help you achieve them. My W has probably cheated on me, she has rejected me, said she doesn't love me, isn't attracted to me, has been cold, distant, short, angry, pissed, selfish, hurt my D's/broke up our family, has probably lied, gone over budget, racked up CC debt and has shown no remorse for anything. I can still sit next to her and smile, laugh, not get angry, etc. Why? I have no idea. If I had to guess it is because I am secure with myself as a man and I know that she is a fool. Unfortunately or fortunately I do still love her and I know if I asked my kids they would want daddy to fight. So I continue on...........
You have done a great job identifying why you feel the way you do. Now start working on a strategy to overcome so you can start healing yourself and potentially your R. You may never get any real remorse from her or acknowledgement of the pain she has caused. You may need to find a way to heal yourself without relying on her to do it for you.
That healing could start with you being confident and secure with yourself and the steps you need to take to get there.
