Thanks Nicole. My journey has been up and down and in the early days of me DBing, I was getting a lot of mixed signals from W, which I didn't know what to make of. So, about 2 months ago I just reached out to her and did a huge temp check. Not exactly DBing, but I needed to have clarity and what she was thinking at that point. After that, I have basically been NC/Dark. She made her position clear and that took me out of my tailspin and trying to control and figure out things. So, it's been a lot more relaxed and positive for me since then. I have no idea what W is thinking or feeling. It's not like I don't care, but I am just indifferent. I know the value I bring to the game and if she's not wanting to join the team, then that's her loss. I am not waiting for her. I am just waiting for me and all my decisions are going to be based on me and how I am feeling. My timeline is really just driven by my goals. Once I reach them and keep maintaining, I will then think about next steps. I am slowly losing all the fear about divorce and life after. I know I am going to be more than fine and my kids will have a stellar dad to hold things down for them and have their back. W can do whatever she wants, it's truly not my concern. I don't pry and I don't ask about anything.
J dawg - yes, I work out Mon, Wed, Fri and go climbing on Mon, Tues, and Sunday. Sunday is with the kids on alternate weekends when I have them. The home gym is awesome and I am so happy to have access to it whenever I want to. If I need to burn or some anxiety or whatever, I can just got bench a few sets and get the endorphins going.
Spent the weekend fixing up the place a bit more and figured out the xmas lights. I have to pick them up tonight and will be putting them on. Going to make this xmas a lot more festive than usual and going to put up the lights in the house and kids rooms. Just brighten up everything for them. We'll go pick out a tree soon, which will be fun.
My boss just came over and gave a nice bottle of scotch for my work this year. So, that was really nice as I have put tons and tons of time on some very important things that were executed beautifully. It's good to get the recognition. Now, time to get a pay raise in 2018, which should be great.
Life is happening and not just sitting idly by. Making moves and taking charge. Truly empowering.
