There are some similarities between our two situations. Both our spouses are originally from overseas, we've both been married nine years, and we both have one daughter close in age. I wish you and your wife could find a solution to fix the marriage.
It sounds like you're taking the right steps on your part. One of my worst fears, having just one child, is the lack of family my daughter will have when she gets older. It seems like such a disadvantage growing up alone in a broken home and not having siblings or a bigger family for support when she gets older. Is that something you've thought about as well? For that reason I believe our marriages are worth fighting for, even though sometimes our spouses want to get divorced even when we don't.
It does seem like our spouses, coming from more restrictive countries overseas, go through a lot of changes here in the US, more so than someone who grows up here. There are so many opportunities here and I guess when they start off with us from the beginning, we can become someone who holds them back from everything (including affair partners). I guess there are so many options to 'upgrade' to a more attractive / fun / younger partner after they get settled here it's hard for us to compete. I don't know. Maybe I'm wrong. It seems like that's what's happening with my husband though, among other problems. Perhaps your wife will someday appreciate what she had with you.
I hope you'll keep us posted on how things go. I'll keep my fingers crossed for good news!
