Oh, I meant to ask and totally forgot...why do cheating spouses accuse *us* (the ones being cheated on) of being controlling?

It seems to be a recurring thread. I genuinely don't understand that.

Me: 48, XH: 42
T: 18 years, M: 15 years

EA/PA 1: 6/2012
EA/PA 2: from autumn 2012-present

BD: 5/2013
ILYBNILWY BD & left: 10/2015

OW conceived: 8/2016
Born: 4/2017

H filed: 7/2017
D final: 28/12/2017