Now all day she has been very nice to me. Not in a sexual way at all but she brought me tea and snacks while I worked at my PC and generally spoke to me quite sweetly all day.
Excellent. What happened was that you "self-disclosed" which is huge act of intimacy and indicated a higher level of "differentiation" which raised the "tension" on her to raise to you new level of "differential" and now she's responding. Some spouses might not be able to handle that much tension and it would be not taken as well as it did in your sitch, plus it requires a spouse who hasn't been raised to think it's wrong.
Anywhere is walking distance if you have the time
-Steven Wright
