Awkward Situation Got Much Worse (part 4 )

[25yearsmlc]

I understand the stance that I should shake up my wifes world to snap her back to reality, but I am certain this would be the end of our marriage for good.

No offense, but in all seriousness, What marriage? What is it about your r with your "wife", makes it a marriage? This is a woman who openly treats you with contempt in front of the children (so there goes the "it's best for the kids to stay together" argument)

and she's broken her vows, AND she's done it with OM who is IN the family so it's not as if future interactions or holidays can ever be the same.

But you guys seem to believe "oh sure they can. You know, like if she doesn't sit next to BIL..."

Easy lies versus brutal truths are the road back to HERE...


As sandi2 has said, this disruption is sure to cause a change, whether for better or worse.

I talked to my sister today to make sure she is not underestimating what has been going on. I reminded her that whatever her husband is telling her, he knew what he was doing was wrong. My sister told me she has set some very strict boundaries on my wifes contact with anyone in her family.


a very strict boundary? How about not within 500 yards of any family member?


My kids are at their grandparents, and you can cut the tension between my wife and me with a knife...its aweful. My wife just told me she wants to drive separately to Thanksgiving even though we are going to the exact same dinners just so she does not have to be with me for the 8 hours in the car. I told her I wasnt taking a separate car 500 miles to the same events. I happily told her I would just stay home. I can tell she is stumped by this...I was not rude, but she is obviously troubled by me not going.


Noooo. This is YOUR family? Why not tell her to take a bus? Or do you (understandably) not want to see the BIL? Even still, you'd send your wife to your sister's house? (if I were your sister I'd say "Thanks, bro, but no thanks").

In your shoes, there's not one family member I'd care LESS to see than your BIL and or your w, for that matter.

This is too Jerry Springer for me. WTF?

Have your own dinner, go out to dinner or literally go volunteer somewhere or eat at a church function. There are a ton around.


I know the DB coaches would say to just take a separate car to give her space. I could do that, or I could just not go and let my W explain why I am not there for Thanksgiving.

Are you SURE that's what the DB coaches would say? I say ASK.

You know it's not as if your wife is saying she wants to make it work AND she sure does not act like it. She treats you horribly.

So, What specifically are we holding onto here?

I adamantly believe the slight chance you have (and there probably is one) of restoring a marriage out of this mess

is by stepping AWAY from it as a family and as a man.

She's walking all over you and that's NOT attractive.

Sorry Tate, I know you're a good guy, but this is nuts. Seriously, too Jerry Springer.

If you could see the forest for the trees, you'd know it is.


GOOD LUCK, truly.

((( )))