For folks joining in on the action at this point, quick summary:
W walked out in typical BD fashion and then mixed messages for a few months which gave me difficulties in doing DBing. Had a big chat 2 months ago and she said that separation was permanent. Since then I've been basically NC/Dark aside from being proactive on kid communications. No pursuing or asking questions. Took some time to get my head straight but then completely focused on myself and things are getting better.
Last night had a convo with W, which was fairly short. You can read up on it at the end of my last thread.
Feeling better today and just about to go climbing with the kiddies, which will be a huge mental boost. At this point I am basically done and will not be engaging in those types of convos for the forseeable future. I am just not yet in a place where I feel physically awesome and mentally strong. But, the plan is now again to rededicate everything to myself and just forget about W.
