My only concern in looking forward is what if the respect was never there in the first place
Maybe not, but she can learn to respect you. Did you detect disrespect in the beginning of the M?
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(my W has always been high maintenance)
Well you lost me there. What does high maintenance have to do with respect or lack of it?
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and she has in fact been a serial offender all along
I have known the type. It would take a lot of firm, consistent determination from you......and then there's no guarantee. If she is a spoiled bratt, you have my sympathy.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
