WHAT IF..... he WAS planning to see me, maybe even spend some time here (which I would not have been OK with, but he wouldn't know that until we talked about it), but I approached him first, about the tags, before he had a chance to tell me he was coming. And b/c I was so stunned, I jumped straight to the conclusion that he had all the details worked out with his sister, and those plans did not include me at all. I remembered this morning, that when I spoke with his sister late yesterday, she said "I"M PICKING HIM UP FROM AIRPORT? We haven't even discussed it! We had a 30 second conversation this morning and he said I've decided to come south so I'll be able to be at the family thing Sunday. He did not say a WORD about staying with me, etc. We were both busy with work, so I just said that's great, Mama will be so excited." I may have jumped way ahead here in READING HIS MIND, and of course I'm leaning toward the negative, and assuming he was going to by-pass me this trip. But I may be wrong. I'm not sure it really matters, but it makes me feel less combative about our meeting, and hopefully will make me more open-minded about what he wants to say, rather than assuming this will be the last time we see each other.
I still don't know what I want to happen, but this makes me want to let HIM lead the talk this time, and me just listen. I can always say I need to think about all you've said. I think it's time I really listened to what he has to say, without leading or steering the conversation, which is usually what happens. VALIDATE.
Oh well, just thinking out loud in writing. We shall see.
M-60 H-51 M-14 years BD 12/26/16 S 1/1/17
"First the pain, then the rising." Glennon Doyle Melton
