Yeah, that's what I don't get. Why have these types of conversations if you're done and have said that you're out the door and never turning back.
I definitely don't believe in everything she says and with her revisionist history of the MR, I know that it's all skewed and she's cherry picking stuff.
I am not going to mind read, but my sense is that this is her move for seeing if I can be a safe person for her to share and vice versa. In some ways it is bananas because I have zero trust and by creating a separation like this, she has created an environment that makes me have no interest in being vulnerable. When I told her I wanted to work on the MR and all of that, she turned it down flat. I was willing at that time to be vulnerable and do the hard work and she wasn't. Maybe she is now, but she doesn't really know exactly what that will look like and wants to feel it out.
So, I can give her some honesty and vulnerability, as I have no expectations that this will lead to her changing her mind or anything else.
I don't know what triggered this for her.
She didn't request the meeting but she kept asking me 'is there anything you want to talk about'. she said it over and over again. If I had said 'no' at that point, it would be blatantly dishonest. So, I said of course there are things that I would like to talk about. And then she asked me when. I told her I can talk any time and put the question back to her. She said any time as well. She wanted to do it yesterday evening after the phone call, but I couldn't because I was in the middle of something, but also because I needed to take a step back and think about this conversation - which was a good decision. So, we agreed on this weekend and she's coming over to my place.
I don't know if I believe her stance on not wanting to work on the MR, but I am going to take that comment on face value and not try to speculate or read more into it. It's going to be one conversation at a time.
