Contact from the dark side.

[Irish M]

I never turn off my phone. I never know when my children will need me.

Hi OwnIt
I am the same as you. My phone is next to me always. I could be in a corporate meeting and if my kids call.. I answer. My partners know this and respect it. EX lied about not having her phone on. She posted so much after hours events on FB. Tagging herself. UNless she drags her laptop out in a bar. I think its OM time so no kids.

I think she needs more time
but maybe this meet up was a step for future change for her once she again FEELS the pain and loss of not being able to persuade you to see life her way and give her what she thinks she wants-her kids back
maybe she will then have to realize her kids coming back or not can't fix her

I agree Peace. She is not ready. Her therapist said it as well. This meet up wasn't a waste of time. I just kept the boundaries very strong. No going around them. Let her spin for a while and hopefully the next meet up will be followed by some real attempts to connect with the girls.

Had to chuckle how she is convinced that she can be a good mom but seconds later shows her hand how selfish she still is and how much work there is to do and ending it with the shot that you are the villian and the reason the girls will not see her, again feeding into what we all know ... she needs to bake more and own her own chit.

Hi Cali
Yes, very funny message when you look at how it was laid out. The key of it was to make herself feel good. I doubt she accomplished it. Me the villain, that has changed so much throughout this. Over the 2.5 years I went from ( in her words) controlling, manipulative, monster, jerk, @ss, f'ing Irish and then I was great dad, wonderful man, loving Irish, always there, supportive to back to controlling and manipulative. This has been a cycle of compliments and attacks since the start.

It is funny, all depends on her mood and if she gets what she wants. When she doesn't, the rotten teen personality comes out as well as the name calling. When she is in a good state of mind I am a great guy.

She'll be back. It's just a matter of time.

Hey Bttrfly :-)
yes, I'm sure she will .Xmas is around the corner and I'm sure it won't be a good time for her.
I truly felt her pain and anguish sitting across from her. Her mother and step father will be leaving soon to Florida for the winter. So she will be alone with OM. No parents, No kids and she doesn't see her sister at all. I don't know how she does it. MLC is so powerful.

I think it’s possible that there is no therapist and she is just saying what she thinks will get you to broker a meeting with the girls.

That's possible Gordie. If there is no therapist she fooled me. She said all the right things about therapy. Things my therapist told me when I was working on myself. Maybe she is doing the online thing or reading. Either way, her courage to meet up did impress me. 2.5 years and to be able to sit across from me took inner strength. Just not enough to run the entire 5 mile marathon. So no crossing the line on this one and she is sent back to training.

Yeah, good luck to her with trying to re-enter their lives for the 5 hours/week she feels like it. Clearly she needs to turn up the heat in that oven.

Hi HaWho
Yes, not a true attempt after so much time. I would be with them 30 hours out of the 24 hours in the day. Now, I cant expect that right off the bat from her but I did expect more. The girls told me their expectations and they are quite reasonible.

- Move closer to them
- No OM ( even no OM in the shadows) OM meaning this guy. Drugs and disrespect of woman on his Facebook. He clearly has no place in their lives and they won't accept him in their mothers lives.
- Therapy with them
- No drugs or Alcohol in their presence.
- No grandmother, she is dead to them
- Be available and make up for lost time.
- Talk open about what happened

I think this is more than reasonable and very easy to do. If she really wanted it.

hope you are all well.

Irish