Still here, I had to take some time to get away from the chaos, from the pain. It's tough reading so many stories that echo that of my own life. Good new is, Life continues from the other side.
Updates from the last year or so (condensed but basically)
1) Divorced 2) Primary Custody of my Children 3) I suck @ GAL - IT'S IMPORTANT, YOU SHOULD DO THIS! 4) WAW- Remarried 5) Everything in my life is doing better than ever, except me. I'm still the same, I've wasted a year. Or maybe I've just managed to survive.
So basically, IDK what to say or where to start. I've been very blessed, the divorce process was painful and it was hard drawing the line between DB practices and fighting for what I thought was best for my family and what would not slash and burn everything to the ground. What I learned was that it it possible to stand up for yourself and your family. It is possible to say, NO. To say, "This is unacceptable". If that is DB, I don't know But I do feel that it was less of a "Mr. Nice Guy". Regardless, It wasn't easy. I can say that I never caught even a slight glimpse of my ex-wife even looking back. No sight of a second thought. Ultimately, I see that as a gift. I can't imagine how hard it must be for those that deal with a WAW who plays with coming back all while having an affair or EA.
For an outsider looking in @ me, I probably look pretty happy. I probably look like I've made it through the storm. I haven't. I have an ex who has remarried someone that she has know for under one year. She now preforms the bare minimum of what a mother does and uses video games as a babysitter when the kids are with her. She truly is an alien compared to the person I once knew.
One positive of this sitch, I have never been a better father. That's really the only positive, but it's a HUGE one.
I have a desire to meet someone new, but cannot let someone get close to me. I just don't know how to trust again. I guess that comes with time.
Is it crazy I still have hope? Is it insane that insane that I still wish my family was reunited? Probably natural, albeit, 1 in a million...1 in a billion.
Anyways, I have been pretty good @ dropping the rope. That thing is LONG gone, lol. Anyways, I just thought I needed to get back on here. I have seen some of the people that used to comment on my threads have disappeared. If you are one of them, I hope you are doing well. I hope you have found peace.
I'll post some more soon, but just wanted to say hi, so, "HI!"
