Contact from the dark side.

[Sotto]

Hi Irish, there is a little more sustained and thoughtful contact for sure. I'm also conscious she was very recently saying she wouldn't see them until they were 30/I didn't cheat/oh I did...and so on. Still flip flopping quite a bit and only recently in therapy - but good that she has decided to choose therapy.

I fully agree with Peace about OM and I would share that with the counsellor if you agree to see them. Also, was your XW potentially using too Irish? I can't recall without reading back..??

I think supporting any reconnection at the right time is the right thing to do. But I also think you may be in for the long haul here, with some dips and turns. What kind of boundaries you set on the contact from your XW are up to you. How unsettling is it for you with her texts pinging in and awaiting a response? The best thing I ever did was take the email account of mine (that XH used to comm with me) off my phone. I realised I was living life on eggshells expecting the next instalment at any moment.

After this, I felt such a weight lift as I only accessed my emails at home and at a time to suit me. He couldn't reach me the whole time, only at a time of my choice. Maybe you could deal with her comms at 6pm and have a little break until morning

Anyway, I'm glad for you all if your XW manages to reconnect with her daughters in a way that is healing for everyone - and I'm sure you will be glad in years to come that you supported this too...

Take care Irish and hope there's something useful here for you!

Xx